Moving out

This is gonna be my last post for the time being since I'm moving out tomorrow and I won't be getting the Internet fixed up until I come back next year.

Anyways, just try to summarize everything in this post...

Finally got a house, a lil pricey but it's a nice place and I especially like the kitchen. Hahaha... I might just start practicing my cooking skills. Shouldn't be too bad right? Since I survived for almost 2 years already. Lolz...

But when I look at the bills I have to start paying... headache man... phone, electricity, water, gas, petrol, car service, garbage disposal... feel like fainting. Really as if I got married and starting new family. Hahaha... But I do kinda wish for that day to come?

Currently wondering if I should change my status to "Single and available". Hahaha...

These days I have been feeling empty inside. Tried my best to drown it out but didn't manage to. It comes back at night when I am lying in my bed alone... then the tears come. Sucks... I know I'm weak. But... this is a little too much for me to bear. It couldn't be that I miss KL that much since I was away much longer last year and I was fine...

I DO miss KL... just not THAT much until I can't function. I mean, I can still handle a job, pay bills and all that stuff. I'm even looking for a 2nd job... Anyone can offer me a good job when I'm back in KL? Just promoting work is fine with me. Lolz...

I guess I am still hurt from that time.

I mean, when someone says they love you and all, and although everything seemed to happen so fast, you were happy. You were really happy. But... then everything just falls apart and no matter how they try to explain to you, you just can't seem to see what went wrong...

What went so terribly wrong that you just can't seem to accept it no matter how hard you tried.

It's not like you don't understand it... you do! But your heart doesn't... it has just gotten used to the possibility that this person might just be the ONE.

And then they rip your heart out.

But it is still beating.

I've been doing alot of soul searching and somehow I could not arrive at an answer.

But, weird things happen.

There is a right time for everything.

I realized, although I felt that the whole thing was a dream, that I was just being played, just a toy for someone's amusement...

I realized that somewhere in that short dream, she loved me.

She really loved me.

Somewhere, somehow, when she said those 3 words...

She meant it.




That is enough.